Now is when we need a president who has the skill, the vision and the courage to cut through this cacophony, pull us together as one nation and inspire and enable us to do the one thing we can and must do right now: Go shopping.

-Thomas Friedman, NY Times

In times of trouble, we are told to go shopping. President Bush told us to go shopping in the wake of 9/11, and here we are told it again. Without delving into the details about how shopping may or may not stimulate the economy, about what this says about our culture, or about whether shopping may actually be the cause of our current financial crisis, I’m simply going to say: No!

Not only does shopping bring me to the brink of insanity- drive from city to suburb, fight traffic, fight for a parking spot, walk around and get lost in a gigantic mall only to find they are out of the item I don’t need in the first place, leave mall, fight traffic, drive from suburb back to city, get home three hours later- but it fills my house with junk that I don’t need. If I were to shop regularly, it would significantly decrease my quality of life. Because once the ephemeral euphoria induced by increasing my materialism wears off, I’m left depressed. How much of my life did I waste purchasing this item that has long ago been relegated to the back of the closet?

But now, thanks to Thomas Friedman, I have other reasons not to shop. My personal anti-shopping convictions have just been superceded by a greater, societal cause. Yes! I will not shop because, as the leaders and thinkers of our time have made obvious, it will bring this consumerist culture to its knees. Why else would they tell us to shop at our Nation’s most perilous moments? Why else wouldn’t Bush tell us to be home with our families on 9/11 and instead to be out shopping? Why else would Thomas Friedman be telling us to shop instead of saving during a time when many of us are up to our necks in debt already? Because they know that if we do stay home with our families and save money instead of shopping it away, our country will go through some very painful times. Our system of unfettered capitalism might crumble from within and things could get ugly.

But most revolutions are ugly. And we need a revolution. So let’s start an anti-shopping revolution. It’s as easy as 1-2-3:

1. Don’t buy stuff you don’t need
2. Buy what you need only if produced locally, if possible
3. If something breaks, get it fixed instead of buying new

Let this revolution bring down excessive materialism! Let it bring down mindless consumerism! Let it bring down the exploitation of the third world! Let it bring down the destruction of the environment! Let it prop up and mandate certain benefits for all Americans, such as health care, education, and decent public transportation! Let it prop up better wages for all! Let it prop up sustainable lifestyles! Let it prop up democracy, true democracy!

So let’s start a revolution by saying no to Thomas Friedman and his call for needless shopping. The time is ripe for change.

Read more of Nick:

• March of the Friemanites
• Presidential Election Prediction
• Complacency
• The Plague
• Government: Friend or Foe
• Intolerant of Intolerance